Can I get some opinions on this situation?

For those of you that read my other question, this one is kind of in the same ballpark. Originally, my issue was whether or not I should leave my parents' house in FL %26amp; move to NY on my own. I have since decided to go back to NY %26amp; finally got an interview set up for next week. I had told them a few weeks ago that I was going to begin looking for jobs in NY %26amp; then today I broke the news about the interview to them. My mom took it fairly well, but my father flipped out. I understand he's upset that I'm growing up %26amp; moving on with my life, but in my opinion he crossed the line. He came into my room telling me that he hates my b/f (a guy that he loved before this point) %26amp; told me that I allow my b/f to walk all over me %26amp; that my b/f doesn't love me. My father is under the impression that I'm moving for my b/f %26amp; not for myself, but this is not the case. I'm confused now b/c my father is unhappy %26amp; I can't even be happy about my decision to move. Can I please just get some feeback on this?

Can I get some opinions on this situation?
You have to do whats best for you. You cant live for your father. He will eventually calm down but meanwhile if you let his abusive words affect your decision (yes they were abusive words), then you will end up resenting him for holding you back. You had confidence and you let his attempt to bully you knock that confidence down. Just do what you need to do for you.
Reply:As a father myself , Id say he's just unhapy becouse your moveing,And you have a b/f that's probly going with you,, But you haft to grow up and do your own thing, just do it and dont regret it, most fathers will not disown there children , and you can bet that even thow he is mad now,you will always have a place to call home, , But remember not to forget him, becouse you only get one and when there gone you cant get them back,just relax , im sure he will come around,
Reply:I didnt read your original question but I think that you should wait and see if you get the job before you just up and move to NY. And as for your dad flipping out, I just dont know. My dad may have been apprehensive but I dont think he would flip out. But you know that dad's are more controlling on their daughter's because they dont want you to get hurt. You just have to explain to him that you are growing up and that you cant live at home forever. You have to become an adult and make decisions on your own. I recently told my mother that I was moving out and she took it better than I expected.


If you really arent moving there because of your boyfriend then you should explain that to him. I think that's he's angry because you're leaving him that's why he started saying all that stuff about your boyfriend. Or maybe he doesnt like him. Just think about the situation as a whole and you'll end up making the right decision. Dont stay at home just because your dads not happy. In every decision you make, everyone is not going to be happy. You can never please everyone.
Reply:...all he needs is a little time. Get your job, get yourself situated then invite your folks over.....good luck!
Reply:Is your b/f leaving with you? Is he living with you guys now? An interview is not a job, only an invitation to negotiate, just like an ad. Are you taking anything that you did not buy yourself? Money? Credit cards? Car? On your own means you have practice at home, like buying your stuff, paying your own bills, helping with the utilities, phones, cable, food, laundry, that kind of stuff. Have you ever done that? Have you ever paid for a nice dinner for Mom and Dad? Being on your own means, the bills are yours, all of them, all the time. Good luck
Reply:Your probably his baby girl and it is hard to let you go. You need to make your own decisions if you are old enough, but you should also make it clear to your father that your boyfriend is not the reason you are moving. I'm sure it will be tough for him accept, but if he respects you, he will eventually give in. Just let him know you love him. (From a father who will be facing this soon as well, good luck)
Reply:I think that you should just be pacient wih him. He is having problmes with letting go .I went though that when my school was taking me to california for a week. it was hard for my parnets to let me go . but it is all about parnets being able to let go . just wait a little he is just going to acept that you are growing up. you can go to theriver1023.com and look up john tesh email him abut this and hi can give you some really good advice about anything.
Reply:tough situation


i think you should talk to ur dad 1 on 1


but first say "Can you please hear my side of the story and could you please not yell or criticize me because it hurts my feelings"


cuz then he'll see that ur mature and that u respect his opinion.


just dont start yelling.


and if he still doesnt agree with u then i think you should do what you think is the best thing.


hope i helped
Reply:just remind your dad that you still love him. be calm no matter how weird he gets and tell him you're going for you, NOT your boyfriend. call and talk as much as you can after you go, and your dad will probably learn to see that your just starting to make your own choises.
Reply:Hi,





Is there any misunderstanding between your dad %26amp; boyfriend? Somehow, you definitely need to convience your dad on you're moving out for brighter career. Try getting help from family members %26amp; relatives (if possible). Worse to worse situation, get your boyfriend to explain to you dad.





AGML
Reply:Why new york - the world is your oyster!





Go to Australia!
Reply:be happy dads are always scared of losin there babygirl. give him time he we;ll come around
Reply:Do what you feel is best. Do not be swayed by your boyfriend though. Let your father cool off and then you can talk to him. He doesn't want you to go because he can not protect you from that far away. Him blowing up is just a way to cover up his real emotions. He is really sad about the situation not mad. Men are programmed not to show sadness. Hope this helps.
Reply:awe i'm sorry, but it's probably just hard for him, his little girl is moving away. if i were you, i would wait like a day or two so your dad could cool down then sit him down and talk to him and explain your reasons for moving out. you should probably reassure him that you still love him a lot and you a grateful for everything he and your mom have done for you but you feel like it's time to move on and start a new chapter of your life. as far as the boyfriend goes...i wouldnt really worry about it yet, if it gets worse then you have a lot of talking to do with your dad and possibly your boy. Good Luck!
Reply:Why oh why do parents have to make it so hard to do something they once did?! My mom tells me I'm on the way to Hell, and I moved.... next door. I gotta get farther away.
Reply:It's hard for parents to separate when their children grow up and move away. It's hard to accept, but he'll get used to it. You have to live your life the way you see fit, just be careful. Good luck to you.
Reply:well u have your own life now and u can do what u want your father he just loves u alot well good luck!
Reply:ok your all grown up.... you cant let your parents tell you what to do with your life anymore. think about they already lived their life and it is time to live yours.
Reply:sounds like dad doesn't want his little girl to grow up. but hon you have to make your own choice's in life ,not your dad. move forward dear ole dad will get over it. !!


and congratulation and good luck with the job interview
Reply:I think your father is just upset that your moving. Give him sometime I sure he'll come around. Explain to him, your growing up and you have to start making decisions on your own. Just give him sometime, then try and talk to him
Reply:IDK sry
Reply:Well, it depends on if you really, really want to move with your bf. It's not up to me, but up to you. You have a choice, stay with your bf, or your parents. And, try working at a McDonalds first, they pay a good amount.
Reply:well, i have seen this before moving for a relationship so it maters how long u been with him and how much u trust him and if he has ever asked for money or valuable stuff. 1-2 years wait it out. 2-3 years consider it but dont be afraid to second guess yourself. 4-5 years highly consider it. but also your dad might be right plus he loves u and doesnt want u to get hurt cuz stuff like that hapens a lot but in general he didnt cross the line cuz u gota think from both views.